Your Russian Girlfriend and Women's Day

The most important day of the year is almost upon us!

March 8 - International Women's Day.

Many people around the world may be unaware of this day, but in Russian culture it is a huge event.

Bigger than Valentines Day or even Christmas Day.

Despite the political origins of Women's Day, for Russian women it holds no political significance, only beauty and celebration.

Not only it is a celebration of women and femininity, but it also celebrates the start of Spring.

And what connects the two?

Flowers, of course!

Women's day is a day where all men should give flowers and gifts to the women in their life. Not just wives or girlfriends, but also family members, even work colleagues.

Men should also not allow their women to do any work of any kind. For Russian women, this is a rare day! No going to work (it's a public holiday anyway), no housework, no cooking. It's all to be done by men.

This is not another Valentines Day, which is more a private celebration for couples. This is a day for ALL women. A day of thanks, appreciation, respect and admiration.

Women's Day is an official public holiday in Russia, Ukraine, Belarus, Bulgaria, Moldova, Kazakhstan, Kyrgyzstan, Armenia, Azerbaijan, Tajikistan and Uzbekistan (along with a few other countries).

It is also well-celebrated in Hungary, Poland and Romania (although it is not a public holiday).

Impress any Russian women in your life with a card, gift, or flowers.

If you are just starting to get-to-know a Russian lady by correspondence, at least send an electronic card. If you know her a little better, organize a flower delivery. It's easy to do. Include a box of chocolates for that little something extra.

For more information on flower-giving to Russian women (VERY important):
Russian Women - Flowers 101

To miss this opportunity is unforgivable!
So get to it!

Do Russian Women Prefer Men With Degrees?

If you look at profiles of Russian women, they are most often holders of university degrees and will usually state they seek men who are also of higher education (i.e. college / university degree).

What if you don't have one? Does that harm your chances? Does it seriously narrow the field?

I would answer: No - there are much more important considerations.

Russian women considering husbands from abroad are more interested in basic human qualities more than higher education.

They want to know if you truly desire marriage and children.
They want to know if you are ready to love and be loved.
They want to know if you are a "good person", kind, honest, faithful and generous to those you are close to.
They place great importance on your attitude to alcohol - no heavy drinking.

If you can satisfy the above, (not too much to ask for!), then you are well on your way to success.

Other factors such as how rich, educated or good-looking you are, are of little importance to a genuine Russian bride-to-be.

Basic human qualities rate far above possessions or achievements.

Now, isn't that the way it should be?

Russian Brides - What's The Catch?

Some things in life seem too good to be true.

If you're using the internet to search for a partner, a healthy dose of scepticism is not a bad thing. It can even be critical when sorting the genuine from the non-genuine, the suitable from the non-suitable.

When you see profiles of women who seem to be "just too good to be true", then the next thought is usually, "OK, if they're genuine - what's the catch?"

To many men from Western nations, it is highly refreshing to see not only physical attractiveness exhibited by the "average" Russian lady, but also real feminine beauty in their thoughts, desires, interests, and expectations of relationships and family.

What's the catch?

There will, of course, be some cultural differences, usually some language difficulties to overcome, adjustment to a new life. But, not only are these easy to overcome, they can also be an enriching and positive aspect to your relationship. (I think this is so important and so overlooked by most people that it will be written-up as a seperate article in the future.)

Really, the only thing men should keep in mind that may possibly seen as a "catch" is:

Russian women want CHILDREN.

If you see a Russian lady as the ideal partner, but you do not want children, you are looking in the wrong place for your future wife.

Of course, having children is the ultimate achievement for all of us - male or female, but whereas many women in the West may increasingly see it as a "choice", to Russian women, it is an essential part of womanhood. It is an absolute given that a Russian woman should marry and have children. It is a cornerstone piece of their cultural make-up and upbringing.

Any man who wants to have children should take this as a "godsend", because not only does she want to have children, she will take it as a joy and a pleasure to nurture your children in the most loving and caring way - like you have never seen before.

To see a Russian woman with her baby is nothing short of beautiful. To see how she sees it as a blessing and a privilege to cater to that child's needs and healthy upbringing, (and not a chore, or a burden, or a "difficult responsibility") - is breath-taking!

OK, so what if she already HAS children?

That now becomes an individual question. If she has more than one child already, she will most likely be content to not have any more. Even if she has only one child, she may also be content to not have any more, as it is not unusual for Russians to have only one or two children.

What if YOU already have children?

She may be fully accepting of your existing children, but she will still want to have at least one child herself. Life would not otherwise be complete for her as a woman.

Is it better to have a child together regardless of how many existing children either of you have? In my opinion, yes, but of course it will depend upon both of your individual wants and desires. Your ages may also have a bearing on your decision. If you're both over 35, and already have children, then you are probably both past the "having children" stage, and are content to seek stable family life with your existing brood. Your (and her) choice.

So is there no other scenario?

There always exceptions to the "rules", but the vast majority of Russian women fall into this category. Children are an essential part of life. It is natural for them, and they will tell you just that! A dream to be fulfilled.

To any real man, this should not be daunting in any way, it should be a huge relief!

Not only can you find the ideal WIFE, but ideal MOTHER to your children. You've hit the jackpot! The best of both worlds - in more ways than one.

If that doesn't inspire you to pursue this particular road to happiness and fulfillment, then I seriously don't know what will.

You can give shallow women the flick. Real women are out there.


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Russian Women and Stupid Men - Part 2

What's worse than the possibility of being labelled "stupid" by other people after getting scammed?

Knowing you've been scammed, and feeling / labelling YOURSELF as being stupid.

So, just "bury your head in the sand" and "hope for the best"?
I don't think so!

As the wise old saying goes - Prevention is better than cure.

If you haven't already read Part 1 to this, do so now...

http://russianwomen4westernmen.blogspot.com/2007/01/russian-women-and-stupid-men-part-1.html

Now, in this part, let's look at Basic Money Scam Scenarios and Red Flags to watch out for.

Most scams/fraud against men from Western countries by women from Russia or FSU countries, are not too sophisticated in nature, but for the unwary, they could at least waste your time and possibly impact upon your view of the women in general, let-alone take your money.

Picture these scenarios:

You contact a lady, or are contacted by one, and you start exchanging correspondence to get to know one another. After a few weeks everything seems to be going well despite the language and cultural differences, and then she asks if it would be possible for you to send a little money for her to continue to use the "Internet Club" to keep up the emails between you and her.

Is she a scammer?

You're in contact with a lady, and all is going well, then she says she wants to come and meet you in your country. She will organize things. No mention of money.

Is she a scammer?

Again, all is going well, she writes many emails but does not answer any specific questions you ask, or if she does, it is only as a short note at the end of the message.

Is she a scammer?

OK, straight to it -
1st scenario - maybe, maybe not.
2nd scenario - most likely.
3rd scenario - most likely.

In the first scenario, it's not a good sign if any woman is that forward in asking for money, as most genuine ladies would not, especially before you truly get to know each other. Having said that, it's true that many of them do have to use internet cafes to access email, as most people in FSU still do not have internet access at home. The cost is not huge, but compared to incomes, it can be relatively expensive. Still, to always protect yourself, remember "Rule 1" (don't send money).

In the second scenario, if she states her intention to come to you in order to meet, even if there is no mention of money (yet), start running (away)! She can NOT visit you. That's all there is to it. When you're serious about your Russian girlfriend, you'll have to go and meet her, in her country. You can bet your bottom dollar that even though she does not indicate any need for money, things will "happen", just before she is due to depart (and just as you're getting excited), and she will require you to send the dollars! And then some!

In the third scenario, it's a bad sign because it sounds like she could be sending you "form letters", the same ones that every other guy she's scamming is also receiving! If the girl is genuine, she wants to know about YOU, just like you want to know about her. She especially wants to know basic things to determine that you are a "good" man, and want to have family life and children. If the letters are all flattery, romance, and infatuation, but not really practical exchanges to get to know one-another, get ready to be disappointed!

Red Flags!

You need to be cautious when....

• She contacts YOU first via a large, free for all, dating site
• She has great photos but little information in her on-line profile
• She writes of "structure" in her profile or initial contact
• She sends you nude or very suggestive photos
• She specifically mentions anything about being a virgin
• Photos she sends have file names that contradict her story/name
• Her profile location contradicts where she says she is located
• Her childhood friend married a man from Germany or France (not an English speaking country)
• Her English is very good - all sentences make sense (Russian-English translation usually results in "jumbled" English at best)
• She writes poetry - in English (again, translation would ruin it)
• She starts writing very affectionately within a short time
• She declares her love or strong desire for you within a few months
• She asks for money at any time, for any reason, before you have met
• She writes of financial difficulty or crisis (an implied or actual money request is just around the corner!)
• She questions you on your income, wealth, assets, in any way
• She says she has no home phone but can call you from another phone
• She says she can get herself a Visa to come and see you. (NOT possible)
• She says she has family or friend in Visa office, airport, or travel agency
• She changes/contradicts details about her family and life
• She makes a mistake with your (or even her) name
• She knows exactly how Western Union (etc) money transfers work

Many of these appear obvious, but they can often appear quite innocent when combined with a good story.

The issue of photos can be tricky. A photo added to each letter can be a bad sign - part of a "form letter" system. Only ever receiving one or two photos can also be a bad sign as they may have just been lifted from the web somewhere. Ask for more photos, and if she does not have them on computer (which could be most likely), ask her to send by real mail.

As stated above, check the file names of images wherever possible - look for different girls names, methodical numbering system, or file names that sound like statements (to fit the form letters, and different scenarios).

A genuine Russian husband seeker is not going to send you nude or very suggestive photos of herself. Nor is she going to mention her virginity. She is also very unlikely to show her deepest feelings toward you for quite some time, as they tend to be guarded about such things, especially before you have met in person.

Any genuine girl also knows she can NOT get a Visa to visit you in a Western country, whether it be a "tourist", "student" or "fiance" Visa, whenever she likes. YOU have to assist her to get the Visa, and remember Visas can ONLY be obtained through your country's embassy/consulate, not through any "agency".

If someone does not have their own phone, then chances are they can also not afford to make overseas phone calls to you! Yes, it IS possible she does not have a home phone, let-alone a cell/mobile phone, but she should still be able and willing to give you another number, usually of a family member close-by, who does have a phone. She should also be very willing to give you her home address, so you could send her (real/postal) mail.

Remember that some of the above scenarios could come up and she may still be a 100% genuine girl, so be careful not to dismiss someone instantly just because you see a "red flag". If anything looks suspicious - test her out on something, it's not hard. If more red flags appear, then it's time to make a decision and move on.

What if you're still not quite sure?
What can you do make sure your Russian beauty is real and everything adds up?

I will continue with that very theme in Part 3...


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Russian Women and TRUE SUCCESS

I had an interesting conversation with an elderly gentleman recently which amazed both me and him.

We were talking about money, property, wealth for retirement, etc, etc. Like a lot of older people, he says "I wish I knew back then (when I was younger), what I know now", in relation to financial matters.

He proudly told me about how "successful" his son was, who had well-above average wealth for his age (mid 30's), and how he was constantly disappointed by his daughter (in her late 30's), who had virtually no wealth at all.

Of course the word "wealth" was used in a purely economic sense.

I know both people (his children) reasonably well, and let me tell you their critical differences, and why I questioned his interpretation of success.

The son is a really nice guy, and yes, has achieved some impressive goals thus far in his life. He is also single, never married, no children, lives a fairly quiet life, and doesn't feel like he's really achieved much at all in life thus far.

The daughter, a bit older, was married and had children very young. The marriage did not last and she became a single-mother for most of the children's lives. She now has two, virtually adult children, who are both really great, surprisingly well-adjusted young people. Yes, she's hopeless with money, and like her brother, feels she hasn't really achieved anything in life thus far.

If neither of them seem particularly happy with what they've achieved thus far, then are either of them "successful"?

Their father certainly thought it was clear who was successful and who wasn't.

I asked him if he thought either sibling envied the other. He replied that he presumed his daughter envied her brother for being much more "successful" than her.

I said I wouldn't be surprised if there was more envy flowing the other way. In reality, I actually thought there might be equal measures of envy between the two, but I was just trying to push the point with him. The old man was surprised at my suggestion, laughing at first, but then, realizing I was quite serious, asked why I would think that.

Rather than answer him, I said "ask him" (your son). He looked worried at the thought, so I suggested he just casually ask his son "how's life?" or "how is everything going for you?", or similar.

When I next spoke to the old man, he had tracked me down especially to speak to me and was keen to tell me about the conversation he had with his son. They live quite a distance apart, so the conversation was on the phone. He said he casually raised the "how's life?" subject and was blown away by what ensued.

The result? They spoke for over two hours!

I was not only right, but even I was shocked at how right I was. The old man obviously thought I was amazing, as he told me all about how his son really admired his sister's "achievements" so much more than his own. He said the conversation was a total revelation, and shook his own views on life, success, and the eternal "what are we here for?" question.

So the son thought the raising of two, healthy and well-adjusted children was a far greater success story than his financial achievements, and single status. The old man was blown-away. He had never really thought of it like that. It was real "meaning of life" stuff, and he had no idea that his son thought that way.

I said: "So maybe that's TRUE SUCCESS, and it's got little to do with money?". He nodded in agreement, looking like a changed man, (I kid you not).

Of course his daughter does not envy her brother. She is very proud of him - not envious.

So what does it all mean?

Firstly, I think everyone, male and female, are only "fulfilled" in life by having children.

Many people will argue and debate that point, but only because they are insecure and dishonest with themselves.

When I then asked the old man: "have you ever praised your daughter for her achievement as a mother, doing so well despite all the hardships she went through?", he not only looked guilty, but had tears in his eyes. (Then I felt guilty!)

Subsequently, he DID praise his daughter, which apparently was a very special moment for her (not surprisingly), although she did say: "I just did what comes naturally to me". It sounds like mere modesty, but I think it's much more than that, probably even more than SHE realizes.

People who CHOOSE not to have children are the ultimate failures in society. Think about it. Like all animals, or plants for that matter, the purpose of life is to carry on through reproduction. It comes naturally, and so it should.

It seems that in Western society, many people have "lost the plot", preferring an eternal life of "zero responsibility consumerism".

Frighteningly, (to me anyway), it seems to be increasingly common in women rather than men, despite the old stereotype that "women want children - men don't". Like my story illustrated, it is largely not recognized that men feel like non-achievers if they do not become fathers. We are programmed to be fathers!

Russian women want children !!

If you are considering a Russian bride, get one thing clear - she wants children!

In Russian culture, success for a woman is measured in terms of marriage and children. That does not mean Russian women want many children, most only want two. In Russia, many women are only having one child, often for financial reasons - wanting to give that child the best opportunities in life. Sometimes there's also the question of commitment to having further children on the part of the husband.

If you look at on-line profiles of Russian (or FSU) women, you will see the majority of them will be very direct about what they want - a husband and children. She will most often say she wishes to create a wonderful family life, looking after her husband and children.

Rarely will you ever see a Russian woman seeking any material/financial or "status" qualities from men. They are simply seeking decent men for life-long partnership with the common goal of having children, and a comfortable, loving, family life.

They will often say "it just seems natural to me". You will also see such comments as "I wish to make home coziness, caring for the favourite person" ("favourite person" = husband), and "I dream of creation of strong family, and a home filled with the laughter of happy children".

Russian women are refreshingly different! Of course, Western feminist non-thinkers are horrified by such beautiful femininity, but who do you think is happier and truly "fulfilled" in life?

Russian women understand...

TRUE SUCCESS = THE SUCCESSFUL RAISING OF CHILDREN

When I first started corresponding with the woman that was to later become my wife, in her first real "letter" (by email), she wrote:

"I wish to have family and children. I do not search for the friend on correspondence. I search for love and mutual understanding. I search for the friend, the husband and the father to our children."

Now that's direct and to the point !!

But as a guy, I can tell you I found that absolutely refreshing!

That sort of directness, obvious femininity, openness/honesty, and "lack of BS" would NEVER happen in Western societies, because the way most people "partner-up" is ILLOGICAL.

Russian women understand TRUE SUCCESS, and what it means to be a "successful woman". They are strong and determined, going after what they want with no illusions or deceit.

Guys - breathe a sigh of relief!


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Russian Women and TRUE BEAUTY

Much is made of the physical beauty of Russian women in general, but there's something even more important about them.

I call this: TRUE BEAUTY

Not all "beautiful" people are what most people would term "physically attractive".

And, you guessed it - not all "physically attractive" people are truly "beautiful".

Really, everyone knows this, and it is especially true in Western countries.

So is "true beauty" the combination of the two? No, not necessarily!

Of course, "TRUE BEAUTY" really equals: "INNER BEAUTY".

BUT, it seems to me that on average, Russian women are FAR more likely to have that "inner beauty", AND, couple that with physical attractiveness - Wow!

AND, it is true to say that "inner beauty" SHOWS on the outside. It is projected!

Observe a Russian woman (or picture this in your mind):

• Who takes pride in her femininity
• Who takes pride in her health
• Who takes pride in her appearance
• Who knows how to walk - like a lady
• Who takes pride in being the most important part of her family
• Who treasures interacting with and nurturing children
• Who cares about the people around her
• Who is highly educated
• Who knows (and practices) self-discipline and personal responsibility
• Who is still able to see fundamental, good & beautiful aspects of life
• Who... (OK, you get the picture!)

Is that an "exceptional" Russian woman?

No - it is a NORMAL Russian woman.

Every man's dream? Possibly!

If it is YOUR dream - make it a reality...


Read more about Russian women and true success:
http://russianwomen4westernmen.blogspot.com/2007/01/russian-women-and-true-success.html


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Russian Women Desire Western Men - Myth or Reality?

A quick search of the web on the subject of "Russian women/brides" (etc) will reveal mostly websites screaming out about how 1000's of women are are waiting meet YOU, and right NOW.

Occasionally, you'll also see an article about "scamming", "immigration scams" and "internet-based fraud" against love-struck men from around the world.

We've certainly covered both extremes! What's the reality for the average guy?

FIRST THINGS FIRST.
Who writes all of those things, and WHY?

The former are written, of course, by Introduction Agencies. (no prizes there!)
The latter are written by "journalists" who thrive on the sensationalism of a "hot story".

Now the WHY part:
Introduction agencies are after your money - of course they make it all look like a dream!
The journalists write the negative, because (as already indicated), "news" media thrives on negative news, not things that are positive and good. (don't believe it? grab a newspaper and tally the "bad" news against the "warm and fuzzy" stories - the exercise won't take long!)

Most introduction agency websites will also offer plenty of "advice" on what to do, how to do it, how to avoid "scams" or "scammers".

To save you the trouble, here's what they ALL say:
What to do: "use our agency, not anyone elses"
How to do it: "register here and give us your credit card details"
Avoid the scams/scammers: "refer to rule 1"

Am I giving introduction agencies a hammering? Yes and no. (OK, mostly yes!)
But, like anything in this world, there are the "good ones and bad ones". I think most of them probably deserve at least a bit of a kick. Some should be banished from the face of the planet. Some should probably be praised for doing a reasonable job.

The point is, they are out to make some serious money out of guys looking for love. Powerful stuff to be messing with - love, relationships, money, family, loneliness, self-worth, etc.

Back to the main point - women from Russia seeking Western men.

There is so much that could be covered here, so let's keep it to some basic points...

Yes, there are many 1000's of women in Russia and the former Soviet Union ("FSU"), who seek marriage to men from the West.

Are the majority of women over there inclined that way?
No! Certainly not.

Think about it - why on earth would a young lady seek to leave her family, friends, home, familiar surroundings, language, culture, job/qualifications, etc, etc, and move to another part of the world just for a Western guy? Are we that great? (hmmm... tough one to answer objectively!)

The reality is: it mostly comes down to "compatibility", plus "supply and demand".

Sorry to sound so clinical, but it's as simple as that.

In Russia and the FSU countries, WOMEN OUTNUMBER MEN.
More accurately - available & marriage-ready women outnumber available/marriage-ready/willing/suitable men.

In fact, the imbalance is quite significant. It doesn't take a genius to then guess what the result of that is. Women must try harder, and men don't need to try much at all! Does that make the Russian men "bad"? No, it makes them human. In general terms, if the same imbalance was replicated in any Western country, the same result would be evident.

Now the "compatibility" bit - it really stems from the above.
If you're a young Russian lady, and you don't manage to find "Mr Right", and very quickly (as Russians generally marry quite young, ie by age 23 is considered normal), you then only have the pick of men who are generally not interested in making much of an effort (clearly, because they haven't been captured!).

Again, I have no intention of speaking ill of Russian men, as that's not the point of this, but you can see where compatibility goes out the window when you've got women who make a lot of effort to be an attractive "catch", and men who simply don't need to.

So, she can "settle" for less than she's after, or further her search abroad. Literally.

There is much more that could be added here and now, but the above is the most important and basic point.

Russian/FSU women are simply seeking the life-partner, whether locally, or internationally.

They are feminine and family-oriented, and simply seek a "decent man" as a partner. That's it guys - it's as simple as that.

The top priorities for the typical Russian female are to get married, have children, and be a fantastic wife and mother. To most Western guys, this is almost unbelievable, and also very refreshing. There's also nothing wrong with thinking that either. You're not a chauvinist, and you're not seeking to "oppress" women in any way, you just like females to be feminine. You find that to be very attractive. As I said, those are the "top" priorities, not the only aspects to their character.

Which brings us back to compatibility. You can see a "win-win" situation emerging. Women and men getting what they want from each other, on the most basic of levels. Women finding available men who are wanting to marry and have a traditional family relationship, making an effort to treat a lady as such, and to provide for his family. Men finding attractive and feminine women, usually younger than themselves, who wish to be a devoted wife and mother as top priorities, and enjoy being treated as a lady.

The Western, so-called "feminists" can throw their hands up in the air in horror, but who do you think is the happier? (couldn't help myself but throw that one in!)

In summary, Russian women looking abroad for husbands seek just that - a husband. Just a decent, "normal" guy to share life's journey with. They are not just trying to escape their local environment or seek a "better life" in a wealthier country. Genuine women are not after your money or possessions. They are generally not particularly materialistic at all. They are after a suitable partner. That's it.

Seeking a Russian wife IS a viable option for Western men, and can be extremely rewarding, for both people. It's also not for everyone, and should be approached with "eyes wide open". Be cautious, even sceptical, but also be open to things that will "blow your mind", and warm your heart.

There's a whole other world (of happiness even), to discover. Get ready.


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